The Golf Police

Irreverent, irascible, Sara Woodward offers an alternative view from the red tees as she takes the fight to the GOLF POLICE

Browsing Posts tagged Ruggy

It happened the same week strawberries were served at Wimbledon, with iced  Pimms. Fans queued quietly and wore straw hats and sun block.  Federer crashed out. Satorial elegance and Swiss cool gave way to the next contender, hungry to serve, ace and volley and  walk with the champions.

England footballers froze in the heat of the South African sun and White Van Fan flew the flag for his team.  It was the day the amber eyed New Yorker teed up his ball and Bon Jovi played at the O2.  A day to both remember and forget. For different reasons.

Summer had finally arrived in a blaze of glory.  Beaches were adorned with deckchairs, towels and sunshades.  Toddlers licked ice creams. Paddled, made sandcastles and slept on the soft sand.

Shops sold out of barbecues, beer and black currant juice.  And it was the same week that Ruggy came up with an idea.

“Why don’t we all go in for the medal?”

“Don’t forget England are playing that day” said Gus.

“There are only 2 million in Slovenia” said Big Rich. “Means they might have an outside chance of a draw”.

“Bit harsh” said Gus.

A football fan to his soul.  He loved the flow of the game. The skill of the first touch.  The movement off the ball. And the goals. It had not been a good World Cup.

“I think they are going to start playing now” he said.  More in hope than expectation.

“Who cares?” said Ruggy.

The tee time was booked. A tee time had also been booked by an American and his son along with a buggy and clubs.  And ahead of them, a regular four ball who would tee up at the allotted time and make their mark on the day.

The fairways wore the brown parched air of summer. Balls ran. Bounces were in the lap of the golfing gods and the greens were fast and true. continue reading…

There are two things you do not want to hear when you return from a golf trip.  Two things which do not go hand in hand with days of thirty six holes, Pinot Grigiot and early starts.  I heard them both.  They were not music to my ears.  Or my legs.  And if Ernie Els had asked, I would have said: “No”.

  The Foot Prof would not have been amused.  A week of hammering the metatarsals on the tee.  Thirty six holes between sunrise and sunset. The Prof with his chunky cufflinks and compliancy rules had replaced the hobble and pain with fairways and the joy of the well struck shot.  The needles and drugs were a distant memory and life was good. With two feet.  

  It had been a good trip .  Despite the start.

“You have got to be kidding” said the Sheriff, looking at the  clubs and the trolley, the battery and charger. A golf holdall for golf bits and pieces. Hand warmers, spare socks and sun block.  Golf shoes. Plus a spare pair in case it rained. The Galvins and black umbrella.  The suitcase had been ditched for a kitbag, overflowing with  shoes, hair dryer, hair straighteners, jeans, shirts, fluffy towel and pillow and a book for bedtime.  Dried fruit and cereal bars for fairway munching.  Ipod, camera and laptop.  Plus chargers.  continue reading…